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Me and my
Aortic Valve!

Dom Robinson reviews

game pic

for Sony Playstation

Distributed by
SCi

  • Price: £24.99
  • Players: 1

logo The Italian Job: You know the film, you know Michael Caine and you know the catchphrases, but what does a console get out of a conversion from a 1969 movie? Basically, Driver, but set a decade before.

Charlie Croker (Caine) has finished a three-year stretch in jail and wants to steal $4m in gold bullion from under the noses of the Mafia and the Turin police so you get to drive fourteen vehicles including flashy sports cars, 4x4s and the classic Mini Cooper in levels that include getting from A to B to pick someone up, playing a game of "Chase HQ" so you can bash up a car as you chase after it and one of escaping from the cops.


game pic The biggest problem with this game is the visuals. Maybe I just don't remember the Playstation's graphics ever being as blocky as this, but as cars zoom off into the distance they just become an indistinguishable mash of pixels. You can make out the various landmarks, but only when you're getting considerably close to them. Given that the PS2 has been out for nearly a year, why didn't this game get released on that platform?

They're also very sluggish and the collision detection is often appalling. One of the quotes on the box, from "Playstation Power", says "Faster than Gran Turismo". Erm.. I don't think so, unless they were playing with that one on "pause" (!)

The sound is almost as disappointing. Car sounds on the PSX have tended to sound lacklustre anyway, but apart from that comes the music from the film, which these days just makes me think of Jamie bloody Oliver and his trip to the zoo, as well as Phil Cornwell's comical Michael Caine impression which is over-enthusiastic, but it's meant to be.


game pic There are 16 levels to work through when trying to behave like the film, as well as the other standard options that accompany this sort of game including a free run of the city (ie. practice).

What else is wrong with it? Well, the trouble with the police levels is, unless you evade the cops when starting out in the level, you'll have no chance of getting away from them later on. And when they do catch you, they don't run you off the road, but just write down your number plate(!)

The stupid thing is that even if you do succeed in this, it's done by simply outrunning the cops - by making sure you don't run out of road in the process - and then turning back on yourself to go back to where you wanted to go in the first place - and you'll find the cops have mysteriously disappeared(!)

Also, you need a rear-view mirror so you can see the result of the crashes when you set up attempting to have the police bash into cars and buses as they follow your direct path.

GRAPHICS
SOUND EFFECTS AND MUSIC
PLAYABILITY
ORIGINALITY
ENJOYMENT




OVERALL

Review copyright © Dominic Robinson, 2001.

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DVDs reviewed by the editor are watched on a Panasonic TXW32R4 32" widescreen TV connected to either a Creative Dxr2 DVD-ROM player or Microsoft Xbox and played through a Sony STR-DB930 amplifier.

PC games reviewed by the editor are on:

  • Since Nov 2005: Intel Pentium D 830 3.0Ghz, 1Gb RAM, 128Mb nVidia GeForce 6700XL, Windows XP
  • Since Aug 2003: Intel Pentium 4 2.66Ghz, 512Mb RAM, 128Mb GeForce4 MX440 graphics, Windows XP
  • Since May 2003: Intel Pentium 4 2.6Ghz, 512Mb RAM, 128Mb ATI Radeon 9600TX graphics, Windows XP
  • Since Jun 2002: Intel Pentium III 600Mhz, 384Mb RAM, Windows 98 SE, 64Mb ATI Radeon 8500LE
  • Since May 2000: Intel Pentium III 600Mhz, 384Mb RAM, Windows 98 SE, Voodoo 3 3000 AGP